ARCHIVE 2002

Merry Christmas, you filthy animal
25th December 2002

Seasons greetings, comrades! After 9 long months Mr Jerky has returned for a Planet Jerky Christmas special! So, where have I been for all this time? I did tell you before I left, but you probably...

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No way you big spastic, you're a...
22nd March 2002

Hello there, little feller. How are you? Okay? Aw, I can't keep stalling with this grotesque charade any longer! The mighty Mr Jerky has a sinister motive for me inviting you here this week. Allow me to...

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Things you call dead haven't yet...
13th March 2002

I, the most-formidable Mr Jerky have reason to believe that Planet Jerky's hit-o-meter (now featuring on the menu bar) is not functioning correctly. Precious hits, the source of my demonic...

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Are you prepared to drink forever?!
6th March 2002

The mayor of Jerkton, Mr Jerky has nothing much to say to you peasants at this present time, so instead of typing his usual guff, he is going to show you some other kind of guff. Below is...

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I want smooth, untainted Duff
27th February 2002

Earth's foremost unlicensed proctologist, Mr Jerky has finally returned from his mysterious three-week absence. Three weeks... That's the longest Planet Jerky has ever gone without an...

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Don't change my pre-sets
3rd February 2002

Thought I'd update on a day other than Wednesday for once. How wacky and unpredictable am I?! It appears my updates are getting shorter. This can only be a good thing for...

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New-look Wrestling John...
30th January 2002

I have removed that weirdy-beardy blendy effect thing from my many pages. Now that I think about it, it was a bit rubbish. Happy now? No, of course not. People like you never are. Carry on with...

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I am the Mayor of Alburquerque
23rd January 2002

I hope you're happy with yourselves. I've finally caved-in to your complaints and removed the ambient background music from my site. But don't think you've won just yet. If you would care to...

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Crazy pretzel montage
16th January 2002

Hey chief! On Friday it will be exactly 100 years (days) since Planet Jerky first went into business and to celebrate, the Articles section has been updated for the second time ever! Statistically...

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I'm afraid sorry doesn't cut it with...
10th January 2002

Chateau neuf du pap! Planet Jerky actually has something new for you today and not just Jerky's Journal. We have not ten, not twenty, but THREE brand-new installments of the award-winning...

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No tricks... just good science
2nd January 2002

Sorry guy, but there's no new stuff in the Planet Jerky archives today. I know how much you were excited about it, but don't be too disappointed - I have some new ideas of vague interest that may...

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© 2002 MR. JERKY